Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Time to Meet the 2008 HBFFL Champs!


Sure, I'll admit that I've had lots of luck gambling on football in the past -- all of it bad. I could go on and on giving excuses but I'll offer only one: I'm a Bills fan. (I know, I know.) I mean, I've been a fan for a LONG time and I just cannot bring myself to give them up. They had me at hello, erm, I mean Thomas (Thurman) and Kelly (Jim). Anyway, its been a tough road and I've stuck with them through thin and thin. Same with fantasy football - I mean I watch football all the time - hell, I even do okay at pick 'em pools - but man, I SUCK at fantasy football. Well, here's my strategy - I play my best players all the time. Based on my success rate thus far I just know something is wrong with this strategy, I'm just not sure what. Anyway, I've decided to give it another shot and if I'm going to lose, it might as well be amongst a bunch of people who claim to have a sense of humour. (NOTE: I'm Canadian and refuse to spell it without a 'U' no matter what your stinking spellcheck says!) Okay, enough about me - with the draft now complete I would like to present your 2008 HBFFL Champions! (Oh, I also start every season SUPER confident - that way it hurts more as the season progresses - I'm a glutton for punishment):

(WAIT! One final note, I actually never do the whole 'research' thing so all my picks, like the post below is likely filled with gross misconceptions and inaccuracies. Sorry - that's the way I roll.)

2008 Roster - What the Canuck?

QB: TOM BRADY - Well, I'm certainly no Patriots fan but this guy is coming off a season where he set the record for most TDs thrown and spends his spare time impregnating supermodels. Book it. Done.
BACKUP:
Brett Favre - I actually used to like this guy. No more. I mean, he had a chance to go out with class and he botched it, like so many before him. (I'm looking at you Emmett Smith.) Anyway, he's do for a bye week.

WR: REGGIE WAYNE -
My sister-in-law lives in Indy so they have become my back-up favourite team, you know - to get me through the season.
MARVIN HARRISON -
Another Colt, this guy is way old school. His younger brother may have went to high school with George Burns but he'll still snag a couple - wait and see.
LEE EVANS -
Let's go Bills! Sadly, with no QB this one is a bit of a gamble but seeing as I'll be cheering for them anyway ...
BACKUP: Anthony Gonzales, Bobby Engram -
I've nothing to add here. (Go Bills!)

RB: WILLIS MCGAHEE
- Well, he used to play in Buffalo I think ... so, good enough.
BACKUP: Ronnie Brown, Julius Jones - Insider tip: teams with no QBs run the ball a lot. Perhaps I've already said to much ...

TE: ANTONIO GATES -
This guy is what is known as 'a stud'. I don't mean that he scores a lot off the field, although I suspect that may be true as well. The TE position is not one that gets a lot of Fantasy attention - but I'm real happy with this pick. On a side note, San Diego is the place where I saw my first (and only) Superbowl in person. If I told you that I watched Tampa Bay beat Oakland you might suspect it was decades ago, actually, it does kind of feel that way as well, maybe I'll look it up? Nah.
BACKUP: Greg Olsen -
Who did what to the where now? Isn't he a basketball player? Meh, whatever ... let's move on.

K: STEPHEN GOSTOWSKI -
Pfft. Kick the damn ball Nancy. (NOTE: Someone has to kick those extra points after those Brady touchdowns.)
BACKUP: Ryan Longwell - Another ex-Bill? Maybe. Anyway, see above.

DEF: BUFFALO -
See, the smart money would be to pick the Broncos. I am not said money. That being said, the Bills D should be much better this year. (Why yes, I did say that last year - why do you ask?)
BACKUP: Denver -
Better than the Bills in almost every category except for being the Bills.

Well, there you have it. I'm getting myself sized for my HBFFL Superbowl cockring as we speak. At least, I assume that is what the prize is. (Did I dream it?) I for one AM ready for some football! With two pick 'em pools, two fantasy pools and countless ProLine tickets - it is time for Canucklehead to cash in! (Once again, super confident to start.) To watch the complete and utter emotional breakdown of a grown man happen before your very eyes - follow the carnage as the season progresses over at my place. Until then, may the good football be yours - CHEERS!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Champs of what...a losing record?

that old gag...